Poop #12, Fecal Finance Felix. It’s 💩-coin season!
We have a bit of a tradition here at CryptoPoop.AI — the only way to say hello to a new member of our community is to let them rub the lamp and make some 💩. Today I’m thrilled that we got to bring back an old friend of mine [ANONYMOUS #5], and what a 💩 he has given us!
For many crypto OGs, there’s an ethos to the movement that drives them to further this critical contribution to humanity. Many of those OGs also buy all kinds of dumb 💩 (I like to consider myself one of them). Whether it’s $DOGE or $BONK, Punks or Poops, $YE or $WYNN, there’s nothing quite like the feeling of being…
Poop #12, Fecal Finance Felix
Fecal Finance Felix, a whiz at cryptocurrency trading with a peculiar, poop-inspired strategy, found himself in a sticky situation. The crypto market was in turmoil, and investors were flushing their assets down the drain. But Felix, never one to let a good crisis go to waste, had a plan — a plan as bold and unconventional as his namesake.
One morning, as the markets opened, Felix began his unusual method: for every dip in the market, he’d eat a bean burrito, and for every rise, a bowl of bran flakes. This gut-driven strategy, fueled by his legendary digestive system, seemed absurd to others. However, as the day progressed, something miraculous happened.
Felix’s bodily reactions started to sync with the market’s fluctuations. A rumble in his tummy indicated a bull run, while a trip to the restroom signaled a bearish drop. Using these signals, he traded with uncanny precision, outmaneuvering his competitors who relied on traditional analysis.
By the end of the day, Felix’s portfolio was soaring, and he became a legend in the crypto world. His success was attributed not just to his financial acumen, but to his unique, albeit humorous, integration of digestive intuition into market analysis. Fecal Finance Felix had triumphed, proving that sometimes, a little bit of poop-inspired strategy could lead to a whole lot of success.
Full disclosure
I am both a HODLer of all kinds of 💩, and think it’s ridiculous, and would like to emphasize that nothing said here should be construed as investment advice.
Join the conversation in The Outhouse on Telegram, or Email hello@cryptopoop.ai, or sign up for early access to The Master Bathroom. 💩 on everybody!
